This may be my first controversial post, but religion is a touchy subject and we’re all very opinionated when it comes to the big guy in the sky. So, with that being said, proceed with caution.. Well, I officially attended my first online EDA meeting last night and have many thoughts and opinions about the whole experience. I was pleased to see that it was very much like any anonymous meeting, even being online. We introduced ourselves, admitted having a disorder, welcomed each other, the whole shabang. We were then given the opportunity to talk and tell our stories one at a time. I guess my idea of a new member meeting was skewed because most of these people seemed to already be miles ahead of me in their recovery. They new what their next step was going to be, while a decade in, I’m still trying to understand what “I’m in recovery” means? I was also hoping for more interaction from the instructor. Guidance from a survivor, I guess? It was clear within the first few minutes that this groups recovery was based solely on God or a (higher power). I did speak out and addressed to the group that I didn’t understand how my recovery involved needing a higher power. Of course I didn’t want to offend anyone and expressed my thoughts with respect, but I just don’t see how admitting my wrong doings to God is going to benefit me personally. Hopefully this post doesn’t offend anyone either and if It does, I truly apologize. I am a spiritual person with my own higher power, I’m just not relying on the idea that there is someone or something out there that is going to aid in my recovery. I wasn’t aware of the type of group I was entering, there was no mentioning of religion. I’m not trying to discriminate against this group for recovering this way, hell, I was raised in the Baptist church. I get it and if it works for them, then that’s all that matters! I, on the other hand, need a group that pushes me to want to get better. Relying on myself and the support of the group around me. Until I can find the group that’s right for me I will continue attending this one, because even though our ideas on how to recover are different, we’re all recovering from the same thing.